Don’t Forget Your Tutu

What… you don’t have a birthday tutu? Huh… weird.

Hello and welcome to my blogging birthday party hosted by me, the hostess with the mostest, the birthday gal!

Now before you make yourself comfortable, I have to ask that you make your way to the nearest sink and wash your hands; we are in the midst of a global pandemic–can’t be too careful. While you wash your grubby mitts, you must sing happy birthday (x2) to me, Bex, loud enough for me to hear. I’ve been singing it to myself for the past week and a half and my hands are practically sparkling. Feel free to continue this process after today.

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I’ve never thrown a party before (and if it’s obvious, please don’t tell me; I shame easily), so I hope you all don’t expect a whole lot out of this thing. I would tell you to put on your favorite playlist while you read along, but if you’re anything like me, you’ll stop reading and start singing as soon as the lyrics begin, and this is supposed to be about me after all.

Now for some light birthday banter…

Growing up I was never allowed to have birthday parties. I was however allowed 1-2 friends over for a sleepover and an outing. Some of my favorite outings included trips to the National Zoo in Washington, D.C., the Baltimore Aquarium (which I repeated for my 25th birthday), and to a local equestrian center for a trail ride. They were sufficient birthday celebrations I suppose, but part of me wishes I had at least one childhood birthday party blowout. I would have wanted a bounce house, party games like egg toss and maybe a nerf gun war, and gift bags for all my friends to take home. I only recall ever going to a party like that once when I was younger (as a guest of course). I ate a lot of cake and ran around shooting silly string to the point of vomiting.

Maybe that’s why I was never allowed to have my own party…

As far as my favorite birthday so far, I would have to go with my 24th birthday. Fella and I drove up to the local drive-thru safari park and had an absolute blast. They provide buckets of pellet food for guests to take with them as they drive through hundreds of acres making offerings to the inhabitants. Of course you can’t feed all the animals; no one wants a rhino horn poking a hole in the side of their car or a zebra hoof coming through a window, but the llamas, ostriches, and even camels are more than willing to stick their heads in your car for a quick snack.

My worst birthday? My sweet sixteen was quite memorable. I planned a sort of pool party at a local indoor pool with my boyfriend, my best friend and her boyfriend. The day before my birthday, my boyfriend got into a car accident leaving him extremely whiplashed. The day of, my friend’s boyfriend was 2 hours late due to a lacrosse practice that ran over. Back then I thought my birthday was ruined. Looking back, it’s laughable how upset I was.

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My mom’s birthday is 2 days after mine and starting at an early age, we started calling the day between our birthdays Tweener Day. Every year we would play hookie together and go shopping. Even my school friends knew about Tweener Day back in the day. I miss those days… Since I moved away from home, Tweener Day celebrations are few and far between.

Any who… this year’s birthday will be spent in quarantine. Not ideal, but I’m sure I’ll make the most of it. Hell, I’ve thrown myself a pretty nifty virtual party complete with party hats and a piñata filled with rolls of toilet paper–I know what everyone really wants. There’s no cake this year ’cause eww, germs, but there are a variety of prepackaged Little Debbie cakes for everyone to enjoy; a max of two per party guest please. We don’t want a repeat of the vomit incident.

Now please excuse me while I make my rounds. Hope you enjoy the party. Oh, and gifts are to be left in the comments below. 🙂

Happy 28th trip around the sun to me!